The Diane Rehm Show

The Diane Rehm Show is an NPR news-commentary show hosted by Diane.  She invites experts -- reporters, analysts, think tank nerds, and professors -- to discuss current events.  It runs from 10 - 12 on weekdays here in the Washington D.C. area with different subjects covered during the first and second hours.  This morning I tuned in halfway through the first hour.

There was Diane and her bevy of experts discussing Syrian Refugees, fake Syrian passports, ISIS, and the recent attack in Paris.  Interesting stuff.  The second show was about the Greater Sage-Grouse.  No attempt was made to segue from one to the other, and that’s probably because there is no way to do so, but neither was there any warning, just the usual interlude between shows, and all of this had an interesting effect on me.  

I didn’t know what was to be covered during the second show and also didn't know that the first one had ended, and as my mind is wont to do, it wandered during the break.  It refocused as the lead-in music to the show played.  Then Diane starts out by asking an expert to "tell us about the Greater Sage-Grouse," and I was completely lost and looking for my mommy (my security blanket).  Mom wouldn't have been able to explain it either, but she could have held my hand.  But she wasn't available, so I did the next best thing.  I have a fertile imagination, so my mind attempted to resolve the disconnect by fitting the grouse into the ISIS discussion somehow.  


First, I tried on for size the idea that the Greater Sage-Grouse was the name of new terrorist group — one obviously with a sense of humor — but that didn't work because such people have no sense of humor, certainly not about themselves, and would probably fix you real good if you were so foolish as to make a good hearted attempt at humor at their expense  -- the best indicator I know someone takes himself or herself too seriously and is going to be nothing but trouble.  So next I tried on the diabolical idea that the military had somehow figured out a way to use the grouse to defeat ISIS.  You know, the way the navy uses dolphins to attach bombs to the bottom of ships -- far more plausible an idea.  I had visions of Greater Sage-Grouses running with bombs in mouths up to a gaggle of terrorists and blowing everyone to kingdom Come.  Suicide Grouse.


It was a little later that I realized this was the second show, and that someone, maybe Diane or some producer, had fallen on her head and, groggy from the fall, had failed to see the discontinuity they had created for their listeners by offering such back-to-back disparate subjects without warning.  People shouldn’t play games like that on us; it's rude, and more than that, it's dangerous.  My brain flip-flopped and I had to reboot to start making sense out of the world again.  


How does one reboot one's brain, you ask?  Probably the best way to explain a brain reboot is by analogy, an analogy many of you might be familiar with.  Remember when your ears clogged when swimming, and to unclog them you tilted your head and shook it?  And if that didn't work, you continued tilting and shaking but jumped up and down to add some thrust to the task?  Well, something like that.

Have a nice day.

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